It Ain’t Me, Babe: With Apologies to Bob Dylan

November 27, 2007

With three swabs from as many cheeks, he places his check alongside, and pays the postal clerk the required amount to transport the small packets from California to Sorenson Genomics. According to their slogan, that’s what one does “For questions only DNA can answer”; that, and wait a few days. Paternity tests are now available to the public through Rite Aid drugstores on the West coast. (New York Times) It is the latest in changing from the age-old question, “Is it I?” to the refrain, “It ain’t me, babe . . . it ain’t me you’re lookin’ for” (“It Ain’t Me, Babe,” Bob Dylan, 1964).

One caveat: if it were 100% accurate, 100% of the time, it wouldn’t be called a test. It would be called the truth, and that is something we’re all lookin’ for.